Mattress Royale

Some where in the tundra of Canada

hi there,
are u looking to get rid of one? i'm trying to find one but have no extra cash. (really) if yours is CLEAN and in GOOD condition, i would be so grateful to pick it up!

(no dirty/stained/yucky, bed bugs thanks.)
thanks, i'm looking forward to a good reply :-)
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Dear Craig

You are in luck my friend, I may have just what you are looking for. My name is Tug and I run a backyard wrastling clinic every sunday at my ranch, well not an actual ranch, you know just a one story house. We have quite a few extra mattresses. After a a few dozen pyle drives, and a couple ten or more suplexes, these things start caving in and flattening out. However they are great for sleeping on, sure beats the cold floor, which I'm sure is all you've got right now, right? Anyways, they do have some staining issues, because of the use of tiny razor blades and barbwire. I would recommend trying the late great Billy Mays' OxyClean for the blood stains. But I can assure you that there are no bed bugs, possibly just some body lice, ie: crabs, not sure if the OxyClean will do any thing for that, but if you drive really fast on the ride home, I'm certain that most of them will fly off. These things are totally free of charge, and when you pick one up, you can stay for a complimentary 1/2 hour wrastling lesson from yours truly. Hope to hear from you soon, If not that's cool, I'm taking the liberty of putting ya on our e-mail list, that way I can send you coupons for upcoming wrastling clinics.

Do ya Smell What I'm Cooking
Tug